Choosing The Best – Part 3

The approval of others does not, in itself, make you any more valuable as a person and does not really add any true value to your life. And the disapproval of others does not take anything away from you unless you let it get to you. Imagine what would happen to your relationships if, instead of seeking to get approval you used your energy to give love and caring and understanding. Imagine how much it would improve your life if you did not have to be concerned about the approval of others. The fact is, you don’t have to be concerned about it. When you move past the need for approval, you can save yourself a lot of time, money and frustration, while at the same time winning the enthusiastic, sincere approval of others in the process.

Stop and think of how much time and energy you spend each day just because you need the approval of others. Now consider all the things you could do, all the value you could create, if you could get beyond that need.

The way to get beyond the need is to look at it as a choice. Seeing it as a choice makes it much more objective and much less imposing. Step back and thoughtfully consider what’s involved in seeking the approval of others. Consider all the costs and consider all the benefits. Are the benefits to be gained worth the price you will pay? That is for you to decide. That is your choice. It is not a need that is imposed upon you. It is a choice that you have decided to make. You can choose whatever you want, but the point is that you can choose. You are not obligated. You are not forced to seek the approval of others. It is not something that has to tie you down or hold you back. It is something you can choose to do or choose not to do, based on the costs you will pay and the value you will receive.

Making a truly valuable and empowering choice is more than just following a whim. Every choice carries with it a set of consequences. So making a choice is not only a matter of choosing what to do at the moment, but also of considering and choosing the consequences that will surely and reliably follow.

Everyone makes choices all the time. Even refusing to make a choice is itself a choice, a choice not to decide. There are choices which lead to a life of success and fulfillment, and there are choices which lead to a life of despair. There are choices that don’t really make much difference one way or the other. There are choices that look foolish in the short term, and turn out to be very smart in the long run. And there are choices that seem to be right for the moment, but end up being wrong in the long term.

Choices are indeed very powerful, and the best way to treat them is with the respect they deserve. The more carefully and intentionally you make your choices, the more positively those choices will serve your best interests.
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